It's My Life

It's my life,
It's now or never....

As many of you know, it has been, shall we say, challenging to refrain from screaming I QUIT in a blaze of profanity and destruction to stay motivated at my job over the past couple of years. I've cried and whined about it. I've applied for other jobs. I've calculated the savings account balance required to chuck it all and start my own little floral business. And with all that self-generated negativity adding to the challenges, it had somehow escaped my attention that I could do something to make it better.

But thanks to Twitter, I've been discovering all kinds of cool nonprofit-management blogs. Because I need to read more blogs like I need new purses and more pizza in my life.  But anyway, some of those blogs turned out to be really well written, inspiring, and helpful. And last week I read a post called "How to Fall Back in Love With Your Job". I even read it with a smirk of snarky disdain. But the suggestion to "ask your boss to let you learn something new" really stuck with me that day, and inspired me to do some research. And it didn't take long for me to find an 8-month Leadership Development course for nonprofit professionals that is offered right down the street from my office. I took a deep breath, and approached my Higher Ups with my request, and much to my shock, they enthusiastically agreed to let me (and pay for me to) attend!

So I scrambled around and got the application materials together, and just sent them in this morning. It is competitive to get in, and I'm sending my packet the day before it is due, but I'm hopeful.

Like, actually hopeful about my job. For the first time in a long time.

Why hadn't I thought of this before? What took me so long to try to just make my current situation better? Why had it not occurred to me that if I were better at my job, I would probably enjoy it more? Could it be that it can be hard to hear the voice of reason over one's own whining?

If this works out, and I can actually Fall in Love With My Job, let me just tell you there is hope for anyone. The idea of learning new things and going back to "school" makes me excited about my work again. It is a foreign feeling, but a good one.

I'll keep ya posted.