shut up and let me go!

i ain't freakin
i ain't fakin it
i ain't freakin
i ain't fakin it
i ain't freakin
i ain't fakin it
shut up and let me go!
hey!

i'm imaging myself singing that song almost out loud on the little gang-plank thing between the terminal and the airplane when i escape to portland on december 5th.

escape? no. not escape. when i 'enjoy my freedom as a confident, single woman with friends all over the world'.

much better.

i bought my ticket to portland this afternoon and i feel the smooth purr of calm humm in my soul. it helps that every time i mentioned my plan to my friends and family they excitedly declared that 'that sounds like a lot more fun than the wedding'. and nodded approvingly.

so now that i have e-ticket in hand (at a ridiculously good deal, i might add), i will remove the lead weight from my decision making flip-flops and skip to the mailbox with my reply card.

mmmmm.....

new topic, with the same song remarkably apt -

so i have a guy friend G who emailed me last week to ask whether i would be interested in meeting a good friend of his. G thinks that M and i could be 'really cute together' and that he thinks that M and i have a lot in common. he tells me that he has already mentioned this to M and that M's suggestion is that we meet up for coffee. i tell him that i am happy to meet M, and would he just introduce us over email and he and i can take it from there?

[insert sound file of crickets chirping]

i hear nothing back.

then i see G in church on sunday. he even sits next to me! we chat a bit after the service and he doesn't say anything about M or the potential meet - up, so i casually mention as i'm about to walk away that i would still be interested in meeting him, and have some time open in the next week. G just smiles and says that M is still interested, and he'll talk to him soon and get back to me. and that "i want to make sure this is done right"...

today is thursday, and the crickets still chirp.

what just happened? did i get somehow shot down before even meeting the guy? did G have second thoughts?

whatever. i dont' want to spend any emotional energy on it. but if G is trying to be overly cautious or decide FOR M and me whether we are really compatible, i have one thing to say to him:

shut up and let me go!

ps - amusing point of fact that will be remarkablly less amusing given my attempts at anonimity,
M's real first name is the first name of The Fling from this summer, and his last name is the first name of my Epic Ex.... how freakishly weird is that??? the only 2 boys to ever get past my first base, combined into one name. and about to be set up with me. ah Jesus, you are very very funny...