born to run

ok, that is a total and complete lie.

i am not born to run. my body shape and bone structure indicate that i am physiologically much better suited to shove things around with my hulking mass. or hoist things up to the span of my hips and carry them like a bi-pedal pack mule. to my credit, i'm a confident kayaker. i think the weight distribution to my lower half makes for decent balance and stability in the precarious pilot seat. plus, i have been working on my 'core strength', and those obliques are required for steady paddling.

no my friends, i am not born to run.

i am the girl who would literally quivver herself into a naseous lather over the looming humilitation and torture of the 1 mile run in school PE. i almost always ended up walking about half of it, coming in among the last trickle of other child protesters who didn't give a rat's ass if the president thought we should be able to run a mile in under 9 minutes, complete 3 chin ups, do 60 situps in a minute, or do the 'sit and reach' past our toes.

i am the girl who agreed for most of her life with her friend A, whose motto is "i only run when chased".

so. why in the world to i have a little sign taped up in my cube where only i can see it that reads " 10.09/26.2/145 " ??

because i have decided to try to run the chicago marathon this year. its in october. and i will need to weigh in at around 145 to run it within a marginally healthy bmi. something i think i owe it to my poor knees and over-strained joints to do.

my first issue of my newly subscribed 'runners world' arrived yesterday, and it was, low and behold, the marathon issue! joy! motivation. good. demotivation is the reminder within it's article for newbies that training for a marathon in no way garantees weight loss. you need more calories, and you build more muscle. right. check. got it. we'll see. BUT i've also been going to yoga class, and it has been kicking my butt already and i'm feeling that sort of manic tendency come over me and i envision myself making complex workout schedules and logs and training sessions. joining running groups. becoming a - GASP - "morning person"...

i could go into the "why" of this decision, but that would be come a long entry in a post that is already too long. suffice to say that marathon training offers in one exquisite, painful bundle a package of spiritual and phyical disciplines that i recognize i sorely lack.

my biggest concern is injury and destroying my historically cranky back. my second biggest concern is altering the damn-near perfection of my legs. i have a lot of mean things to say about my body, but i gotta say, i have killer gams. so i'll keep a close eye on them, lest they become too manly or thick.

tune in next time when i confess to my oprah-style 'dream life' collage and how weird and wonderful it is to see some of those pipe dreams materialize...

don't judge me. i have plenty of negative self-talk to balance out the daily affirmations =)