when was the last time you listened to enya? high school you say? well, me too probably. although that is the sound that pops into my head when i am trying to scramble around to find my happy place.
the happy place has been an elusive character these days. work. is bad. like, stomach in knots bad. like, crying in the bathroom bad.
some of it can be chalked up to my continual string of silly mistakes. some of it is boss dynamics. and some of it is straight-up bad luck. like workshop speakers getting strep, and maroon 5 posting a concert the same night as your campus event.
in any case, a graphic and hopefully humorous analogy popped into my head on the way to work this morning: every day is like the day you have to go to the gyno. uncomfortable, squicky, mild to moderate dread, and you feel gross all day. you think about it the night before, you think about it when you get home. only it is like that EVERY DAY. but, as my colleague pointed out this morning when i shared this idea with her, at least my friends are hanging out with me in the waiting room.
i do have great friends here. in fact, my colleague C went out and bought me an adorable bouquet of flowers yesterday when i almost blacked out in hysterics when i realized that an email went out to 700 people with the wrong workshop listed on the wrong date. the email that i, and 3 other people, had approved. we never caught the error in proofing, but the nanosecond i opened it after it was sent, i saw the goof. i almost blacked out. the blood was thumping in my ears and i was hot and clammy.
but nothing was said - i don't think boss caught it, and i made a correction before it could be too much of a train wreck.
so there you have it. every day is like gyno day. i wish i could figure out a way to turn this sinking ship around. but so far my best idea is to get back onto npo.net and idealist and start networking and jump ship.
thanks for being my life boat.
2 comments:
Ok, can I just share how uncool I must be? I like listen to Enya... all the time. It's in my car CD player and the one in my bed room, and it is totally high school. I know this because some high school camp counselor introduced it to me at some silly middle school 1 night overnight. And I was in awe... I'm thinking it was the coolest thing, so I bought Watermark 3 years later, why 3 years later? Because I'm so cheap that's how long it takes me to convince myself it is a worthy purchase that I will enjoy. And from then on I have allowed my self to purchase Enya CDs without hesitation. and is about one of the only artists that I have ever purchased out of a music store. I'm I a dweeb or what? It is my guilty pleasure to listen to it when I go to sleep when Stan is out of town. I actually "borrowed" (and never gave back) and piano book of the score of Shepherd Moon. Seriously? What's wrong with me? It was the first playlist that went on our refurbished nano the second I needed to go out of town. The most blissful white noise was my justification. And its not like I'm obsessed or anything with the music it's just that it is my Linus security blanket. And like Linus I know it is not cool - but you wouldn't hit an innocent shepherd would you? And lo' they were so afraid. I hope you are able to "sail away" from all the yucky gynie feelings at work. Am I a loser or what that I can even make a pun out of her lyrics? That is all, just wanted to share my amazing un-coolness. It's a blessing... and a curse.
jess, i LOVE IT. thanks for sharing :) i actually haven't listened to enya in years, but i loved it very much for a long time. no judgement here!!
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