heartbeats

Roommate reminded me last night that it has been a while since my last post. and i lamented to her that that is because i really really really don't want to make every post about Yale, but really he is all i want to talk about these days. and he is certainly the only interesting thing going on with me at the moment.

i don't know how most boys are when it comes to talk of engagements and weddings and wedding plans, but Yale is like giggling over the moon ridiculous. at it makes my heart beat fast to have him be so excited with me. his voice took on a decidedly whiney pitch this weekend when he bemoaned the fact that he wanted to propose to me RIGHT THEN and be engaged immediately, and would i accept a ring pop or a piece of pretty string in lieu of an actual piece of jewelry. i've asked him not to talk with me any more about rings or engagement plans, because it makes me unreasonably twitchy, and i want it to be a surprise, and i'm totally calm with whatever timeline works out.

well, so, there's "totally calm" and there's the version of calm that inspires me to scour the internet for venues, dresses, ideas, colors, flowers, shoes, favors. cake. and keeps me up at night with visions of vineyard weddings under a flower-draped pergola at sunset.

yeah.

calm. my version.

and speaking of calm, on a boy-unrelated note, work has been decidedly and almost eerily calm for almost 2 straight weeks. the boss has been chill. even cautiously complimentary. i haven't been sniped at, and i have been able to just do my work in peace. surprise, surprise, i think my work has been better and i have been more productive just having had a few weeks without the cringe and angst of lurking away from the shadow of her looming meanness.

sigh.

yay!