boom boom pow

so.

thanks all y'all who have talked with me about the squickier issues i've been mulling over about Yale and me this week. truth be told, the topless sunbathing disagreement was not really what had me stewing. yeah, i was wrapped up in it for a day or two, but the real angst was about some larger though definitely surmountable differences of opinion about some thorny theological questions. you know, normal light relationship stuff like divergent views on eternity, the literality of scripture, and tangible evil. heck, i'm glad he and i are so deep in our personal faiths that these are questions and conversations that even come up. and can be discussed openly and intelligently. but then the real head-scratching begins when one starts to wonder just how "like minded" you and your love have to be to be "right for each other"....

but somewhere in between little bouts of panic, and little bouts of panic about the fact that i really wasn't very paniced at all, i felt a wash of peace and calm. assurance and reassurance. and several of YOU, dear readers, had a lot to do with that. i was reminded that the TRUTH is all he or i can cling to, and that the Lord will reveal it to us even though he and i both bring skewed views to the table.

and then with a BOOM, on the phone with him the other night, the niggling twitches and question marks fell off and i felt very much IN LOVE. with Jesus.

and Yale.

but it was Jesus who shone through the weirdness, and my insecurities, and my questions and doubts and fears, and reminded me that i am LOVED. that He has it under control, and that everything is actually very very good. and that i can trust him with my heart, and with Yale.

who knows where he and i will end up in these debates. i doubt we will have it all figured out any time soon, and even then, we'll still have lots more to learn. but i know where his heart is, and i know Who he loves. even more than he loves me. and he loves me a LOT.