life in technicolor

surreality is:

fearing, hating, trembling, dreading, churning, angstily fretting my job for about 6 or so of many of the past 8 months. praying, crying, searching for new jobs. scratching my head about what to do. praying. talking to Yale. praying some more. crying some more.

and then getting the insecurities confirmed at my 1 year review.

and THEN getting a sort of surprise "re-review" yesterday and getting a raise. and having the boss tell me that she has been so pleased with my improvement that she and the VP discussed it, and they decided to upgrade me.

wha?

i mean, seriously, what??

i knew that my organization had decided to do a big revamp of the way they do annual reviews and the way they configure raises. but i just had a review, so i wasn't due for one for about 8 months. apparently though, my work has been so much better (or my boss has been so much happier/better pharmaceutically regulated) that they decided to include me with all the new "everybody gets their review and their raise in april" raises.

which of course is very good news. not just the cash. the cash will help, but what is really remarkable for my quality of life is the acknowledgement by my boss and HER boss that i am actually doing my job well, and improving the areas that were lackluster. in 4 months. which means by this time next year, i can fully expect to get "rockstar" on my HR review forms, right?

i hope so. because now that i don't cower in fear at the footfall of my boss, i am actually enjoying my job quite a bit. and my work friends continue to be a bright spot of my day. i am really very very fortunate to have not just coworkers but friends at my job.

now we just have to get Yale a job.

i was a little hesitant to tell him about the raise and stuff, even though i was excited and felt that in many ways, i owe him a lot of thanks for all the prayers he has said for me and my boss, for all the listening, encouraging, and total support. but i was nervous too. because he so desperately wants to be working at a job, and he has not yet had any real nibbles. nothing has come of the Augustana interview so far. he hasn't been officially turned down, but has hasn't had an offer either. and nothing else has come up.

sigh. at least now i feel a bit more confident that i can cover both of us and our rent going forward. i'd just love for him to find a job that uses all the great gifts and talents and brilliant brain that the Lord has given him. such a great lot of brilliant brain cells and sweet sweet heart. i'm sure there is a plan for him. i just wish we would get a clue of the next piece.