strange condition

Hubs has been quite smitten with babies lately.  It's actually very cute.  He cooed and giggled effusively over our Nashville friends' baby, and the kiddo seemed equally infatuated with the novelty of Hubs' scruffy facial hair and baseball-capped head.  Hubs managed to sleep through all of baby E's tumultuous nights of non-sleep, even though AugDog and I were awakened a few times along with his harried parents during our weekend visit.  Hubs wanted to know everything he could think of about E's eating, sleeping, development, facial expressions, cries.  He was doing research.  He seemed pleased with the data. 

On the drive home from Nashville, he asked me casually what I was currently thinking, you know, baby-wise.  I sensed the good natured trap I was about to walk into, so I flipped it back to his direction with a "We already have a baby.  He's furry, and sweet, and amusing himself quietly in the back seat."   Hubs just laughed and agreed that our fur baby is plenty to take care of right now. 

But then we had lunch with JB and AB and their even tinier baby.  Hubs sheepishly hinted that he would like to hold him while JB ate her lunch, and she gladly agreed.  Hubs sat next to me, whispering sweet nothings to baby G about toes that looked like "little Pez" and soft baby hair, while sipping his soda and uncharacteristically ignoring his plate of falafel.  I began to feel some panic twitch inside me.  A sort of happy panic, but panic none the less. 

Later that day, in a preemptive strike to address any baby-having notions that may have been floating around in Hubs' head, I asked him whether it might make sense to start researching adoption.  How much it costs, how long it takes, what hurdles and hoops we should start preparing to leap.  You know, because it takes a long time and costs a lot of money.  And maybe we should start preparing for that.  We ended up having a great warm conversation about adoption, and I felt very good about the whole prospect.  Proceed with the investigation, pray, get advice, get serious about a savings goal; he'll keep working for a permanent job in the mean time. 

I told him, quite honestly, that I've felt a growing soft place in my heart for parentless children.  How deeply and broadly I miss my parents, but how thankful I am that they were rock stars while we enjoyed their love on earth, and how I would like to be able to be parents to a kid who doesn't have any.  Not to replace their parents, but to love them and care for them the best we can.  I concluded my little speech with "I don't think the world necessarily needs more babies.  But it does need more parents."  And he smiled and said that he agreed, and that we should keep pursuing this idea.

Late that night, hours after our adoption conversation, and after we've said goodnight and made ourselves comfy in bed with AugDog nestled between us, Hubs leans over and says to me; "Wouldn't you maybe like to maybe think about the idea of having a baby of our own?  You know, one that we can have when he's so little that he still has little Pez toes?".  And I just laughed and promised we could keep talking about it.  In the morning.  When we're both thinking more clearly.