i still haven't found what i'm lookin for

so.
i was offered a job yesterday. i've been praying those begging fear-gripped prayers for a new job for so many months now, it was a bit like the twilight zone to actually be offered one. i was excited about the job after the first interview. liked the people, got excited about the work, was eager to jump out of my current ship of tedium. somehow in the intervening two weeks, i have been plagued with doubt.

part of me is gun-shy. i was excited when i took my current job, and anyone who knows me knows that i haven't exactly been challenged or, shall we say, fairly compensated. so i don't want to end up in another job-hating job.

part of me feels a bit guilty for leaving my current job in a lurch. i like my colleagues, and i don't like the thought of stressing them out. i like the students i work with and i know that frankly without me, they will be a bit like flopping fish gasping for air. nobody else here really knows how to do the things that i do.

and part of me knows that this job offer is for a job that, while slightly better-paying and hopefully much much more stimulating and creative, is not "The Job".

i have no earthly clue what "The Job" would be.

so i've been praying about it, i've been asking wise friends for their input, i've been wracking my brain to try to figure out what i should be doing with my life. still clueless.

plus, well, at the end of the day i still need to be able to pay my terrifying pile of loans. so there's that.

so i've basically decided to take this job and keep pursuing my passions. serving people, working towards justice, making things beautiful, investing in people. i can do that no matter what i do from 9-5.

right?
right?